Saturday, August 20, 2011

SMAC: The Shellator Edition

A lot of you may be wondering what happened to this month’s edition of SMAC (I say “may” because we all know that really isn’t the case. Please just validate me).

The reason you didn’t see anything hilarious or painful on the 2nd of this month is because we’ve all been busy concocting a mad scheme to humiliate celebrate everyone’s favorite Nip Cliquer (there was a poll), Shelly from Starting Over.





Her birthday is today, and in the grand Nip Tradition of forcing all of us to come to terms with the aging process, we decided to change the name of the anagram from Shitty Movie Awareness Club to Shelly Movie Awareness Club. You’re welcome, Shells. <3<3<3

For the last couple of months, there have been emails, spreadsheets (of course), smoke signals and carrier pigeons in order to get this party started. So not only did we manage to pull this off in time for The Shellator’s actual birthday, I’m totally impressed that we did this completely behind her back. And Shells, if you did actually figure this out, please just let us have this.

Not like I would have an issue with anyone I got paired up with, but I’m stoked to be posting for Rio. I also convinced Risha to add in some commentary, so it’s kind of like the best threesome in the history of blogging. If you feel like skipping the rest of this intro, you can scroll down and read Ginny’s review of Short Circuit, whenever she gets it to me. BTW, the entire Nip Clique have been campaigning for months to get Gin voted Featured Blogger, and it finally worked. Mob mentality FTW!

Anyway, you can see the list of bloggers who worship The Shellator below, along with their choices of Shelly-based movies. We’re all waiting for her to pretend to be pissed off, but then be like, “Oh dear!” and be super embarrassed but also secretly laugh.

We love you, Shells- we hope this is your best birthday ever! And uh, please vlog your face when you read this post.



This Month’s SHELLY MOVIE AWARENESS CLUB Swap List:

GINNY with Short Circuit
NUGS and RISHA with Beauty and the Beast
RIO with Scooby Doo
LILY with Alice In Wonderland
COYOTE ROSE with 2009’s Star Trek
MANDY MOORE with Now & Then
TABS with Star Wars
LORRAINENICOLE SWEENEY and SARA NIPPLES with Susie Q
HARLEY with The Aristocats

And now- Ginny brings it.

This month for the shitty movie review ring we're mixing it up. First of
all it's Shelly birthday! Happy birthday Shelly! Second of all we picked movies to review that remind us of Shelly. Lastly, this is not a shitty movie and if you tell me you don't like this movie I'm going to think there is something wrong with you.

Editor’s note: I TOTALLY agree. This movie is awesome.

When I think of Shelly I think of cats and animals. If a live robot came to Shelly's house I have no doubt she would take it it in and have a little robot pet. That's not a very good hint to the movie I'm reviewing so I'll just tell you. In honor of Shelly I'm reviewing Short Circuit. Johnny Five is the original Wall-E!

In case you haven't seen this classic 80s movie this is what you need to know. There's a robot (number 5) that gets struck by lightning and becomes alive. He escapes from Nova and Nova wants their pricey robot back. Steve Guttenburg along with some random indian dude that has the best lines in the whole movie try to get the robot back since they created the robot and their boss is pissed.

Now Ally Sheedy takes in Number Five because her character Stephanie takes in every animal under the sun! She's got cats, skunks, dogs, bunnies, geese, kittens, and now a robot who she thinks is an alien. Yeah because my first impression when I see a robot is that it must be an alien. Stephanie is the reason why this movie reminds me of Shelly. How many cats can I have? Not enough. At least this is what I imagine Ally Sheedy says in this movie because this woman has a zoo in her house.






Now the Indian engineer sneaks in these lines that have me dying laughing.




"I am thinking she is a virgin, or at least she used to be."

"With excitement like this who is needing enemas?"

Driver: "He can't shoot us with that lazer can he?"
Ben: "I am not knowing!"
Driver: "Would he kill me if I stop?"
Ben: "Who is to say?"
Driver: "Will he kill me if I don't stop?"
Ben: "Again I am shrugging!"

At the end of this movie Steve Guttenberg invites Alley Sheedy to live him on some huge amount of land his family has in another state. She hesitates for five seconds and then asks him how he feels about animals. That's right Guttenberg, Ally Sheedy is taking all her animals with her and you can't stop her!  Shelly should be cast in the remake.

1 comment:

Steve Bailey said...

The remake???? I just googled to see if they are making a remake and.... they are. What's next.... a BioDome remake?